# I’m Too Young for This ##### How perimenopause is not about ageing ![[Photo by Milada Vigerova on Unsplash.png|Photo by Milada Vigerova on Unsplash]] --- I was on the cusp of my 40th year. And things were changing. I knew what was ‘normal’ for me in terms of hormones. I’d been tracking my menstrual cycle for years. Now? My cycle was off. My mood swings were fucking horrendous. I was getting migraines. My anxiety had ramped up. And I couldn’t sleep. By this point, I was already a Perimenopause and Menopause Coach. I *knew* what was happening. But when I spoke to other women feeling the same way, so many of them said *I’m too young for this.* Hence the rest of this post. Because if you’re in your late 30s or early 40s and something feels off? It could well be the start of perimenopause. --- ## Menopause vs Perimenopause %%[[menopause Vs perimenopause]]%% Let’s clear something up. Menopause and perimenopause *are not the same thing.* **Menopause** is when your periods have stopped completely for 12 months. It’s a single-day event. After 12 months of no periods, you’re menopausal. The *average* age being around 51. %%[[perimenopause usually lasts about seven years but can be as long as 14 years]]%% **Perimenopause**, on the other hand, is what happens before that. “Peri” means around. It’s a process. A sequence of hormonal changes that usually lasts around 7 years (sometimes as long as 14). It’s not one moment. It’s a whole thing. --- ## Perimenopause Is a Normal Process Yes, it can suck. Yes, the symptoms can be brutal. But that doesn’t mean it’s not normal. We don’t need more fear. Or judgement. Or scaremongering. We need education. Support. Real talk. Perimenopause *isn’t* a disease. It’s *not* a pathology. It’s a biological transition that every woman will go through (if she’s lucky to live long enough). Puberty started our reproductive years. Perimenopause signals the end of them. It doesn’t mean something’s wrong. It means something’s shifting. --- ## It’s Not About Ageing One of the hardest parts of perimenopause? The story we attach to it. That this is the beginning of the end. That it means we’re “old.” That we’re irrelevant. Invisible. Done. And with that comes a whole storm of emotion. Grief. Rage. Shame. Fear. But here’s what Lara Briden says in Hormone Repair Manual (and I love this)... %%[[perimenopause is not about ageing]]%% > **Perimenopause is not *caused* by aging.** **It just happens *alongside* it.** Perimenopause is its own process. Yes, it might feel like an ending. But it can also be a beginning. One that’s powerful. And really fucking liberating. --- ## Perimenopause Is Like a Second Puberty ![[too young for this - oestrogen 3x more in perimenopause.png|Image: Lara Briden]] %%[[perimenopause is like a second puberty]]%% %%[[oestrogen changes through our life]]%% Perimenopause is hormonal chaos. Just like puberty. But backwards. Before puberty: low oestrogen. Then: high, wild oestrogen (remember teenage moods?). Eventually: cycles stabilise, and progesterone kicks in to keep oestrogen in check. That’s the bulk of our reproductive years. Stable-ish. Then: perimenopause. Progesterone drops first. Oestrogen goes rogue. Mood swings. Migraines. Insomnia. Tears. Rage. Eventually, oestrogen drops too. Hello menopause. Low and steady again. Like childhood. --- ## Track Your Cycle – Seriously! If you’re not tracking your cycle in perimenopause, start now! Especially ovulation. The earlier you spot the changes, the more information you have. For yourself. For your GP. For your therapist. For anyone trying to support you. It’s not about obsessing. It’s about awareness. --- ## Final Thoughts %%[[you're not imagining things, something is changing]] [[perimenopause symptoms are likely to be temporary]]%% If you’re in your late 30s or early 40s and something feels off... you’re not imagining it. (If you are concerned at all, please visit your GP). But it *might* be perimenopause. And if it is? You’re not broken. You’re not alone. You’re not “old.” You’re becoming. It can be confusing. Messy. Full-on. But it’s also a chance to listen. Slow down. And take care of yourself in a whole new way. %%[[many of the health challenges associated with menopause could be significantly reduced if we used our 40s for repair, healing and nourishment]]%% As Alexandra Pope and Sjanie Hugo Wurlitzer say in Wise Power: > “Many of the health challenges associated with menopause could be significantly reduced if we used our 40s for repair, healing, and nourishment.” Amen to that! --- ## Sources - Briden, L. (2021). *Hormone Repair Manual : Every woman’s guide to healthy hormones after 40*. S.L.: Pan Macmillan Australia. Hormone Repair Manual by Lara Briden - National Institute on Aging (2021). *What is menopause?* [online] National Institute on Aging. Available at: [https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/menopause/what-menopause](https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/menopause/what-menopause). - %%[[Wise Power by Alexandra Pope & Sjanie Hugo Wurlitzer]]%%Pope, A. and Sjanie Hugo Wurlitzer (2022). *Wise Power*. Hay House, Inc. Wise Power by Alexandra Pope & Sjanie Hugo Wurlitzer - %%[[(Prior, 2006)]]%%Prior, J.C. (2006) ’Perimenopause lost—reframing the end of menstruation’. Journal of Reproductive and Infant Psychology, 24, 4, 323-335. Available at: [http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.1080/02646830600974071](http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.1080/02646830600974071) (Prior, 2006)